Sexbruise? Is a jam band-adjacent dance-party band made up of several people. The band first gained notoriety in 2019 when they broke the world record for largest pizza. The pizza measured over 3,000ft across and spanned 2 city blocks.

Since no one wanted to eat it, the pizza sat festering in the sun for several weeks, leading to a severe rat infestation. To combat the infestation, the mayor ordered 500 peregrine falcons to be released into the city.

The plan worked, but with their food supply depleted, the falcons grew desperate and started swooping into people’s yards, eating their dogs and cats, and occasionally ripping people’s faces off. The mayor had to bring in a team from Florida to try to fight back against the falcon population, but the falcons were crafty and their retaliation was swift and the conflict escalated into an all-out war.

Meanwhile the pizza was still rotting in the street and had displaced several local businesses throwing the area into a recession. A homeless encampment was quickly established under the northern crust of the pizza.

The encampment thrived and over time, the Crust People formed their own language and customs, free from the prying eyes of the outside world. They lived in peace, and the crust protected them from the Florida/Bird war that waged just outside. Each night, the Crust People convened in the street to make love and dance.

Sexbruise? Is brought to you by Skrewball Peanutbutter Whisky